neckbone pieces

Summer so far

2009-06-22T17:37:00.000-04:00

I've managed to partly clean out one closet and get the liquor out of the same closet and into a new liquor cabinet, but that's really about it for housework. Lots more to do. Lots.

But, I have spent quality time with friends and family, I've learned a lot more about facebook, I've crocheted some cute hats with flowers, I've read a book (not a very good one), I've caught up on New Yorkers, I've had lunch out frequently, and I've stayed up at night as late as I want to ... night after night.

Not a bad summer so far.

The picture is Indian Boundary lake where we swam last week. Great, except for the biting flies.

aging

2009-05-23T14:37:00.000-04:00

this aging sucks. everybody i know has ailments, elderly parents to care for, or some other major problem. i need to play with the dog more, watch less news, and stop thinking about
the rough spots.

2009-05-08T01:30:00.000-04:00

I saw this beer truck while waiting on a ferry on the Outer Banks of NC in March. I've never been to any islands in the Carribean so I'd never heard of this beer. At the next stop we found a store that had LOTS of beer on a 'wall of beer' so you could mix and match and make your own 6 pak. They had Carib, too. We bought a lot of beers from all over the world. This Carib was really good, too. And so colorful.

I got out of the habit of blogging regularly. Occasionally I would be driving and thinking about something and it would cross my mind that I should blog about it, but mostly life has been like most other peoples' lives...full of work work work and expending energy to relax from work work work. I've wasted a lot of time playing Breaking Bubbles on my pda, reading CNN and MSNBC, and recently watching Clean House. I've been engaged in little dramas at work, away from work and in semi-public, none of them especially fruitful or interesting.

One of the memorable experiences I've had in recent weeks was listening to the White Album (yes, the one by the Beatles) that everyone in the world has listened to many times but me. I was in a friends little truck, borrowed for the day, and was listening to the CD that was in the player. I was half asleep (and I wasn't even driving) and really got into the music. I didn't know who it was. After a few songs I had a clue that it might be the Beatles. I asked my husband, who confirmed it was the B's. He couldn't believe that I had never head the White Album. I've heard of it, seen the cover but didn't have a clue about the songs on it. I recognized many of them, but not all of them. I thought it was great. I felt a little out of step, like somebody's grandmaw who had never heard rock and roll, but then I thought that I was probably lucky. I heard the music for the first time. It was fresh and new to me. It wasn't THE WHITE ALBUM but a surprisingly good collection of songs. I felt like I had discovered something special. And the fact that everyone else discovered this many years ago didn't diminish my enjoyment one bit. it did take me aback a bit that the CD was actually the property of the 10 year old daughter of the truck's owner, who is really into the Beatles.

check out this website

2009-02-15T00:49:00.001-05:00

www.grocerylists.org

Rhoda

2009-02-08T20:26:00.000-05:00

This is Rhoda, the new dog. She's a real sweetie. This was taken a few days before we actually got to bring her home from the pound. She's been here for about 3 weeks now and is fitting in well. She's very playful and sociable and grateful for a family, and we're grateful for her. Dogs are wonderful things to have around.

xmas 2008

2009-01-03T00:50:00.000-05:00

Here is one of the highlights of this holiday season...we took a ride on a fast boat down the river and back. It was very beautiful and exciting and surreal. It was a cloudy, foggy day but not too cold. We couldn't see the mountains well, but we did see lots of birds, including a bald eagle that we either saw twice, or two bald eagles (one going downriver, the other coming upriver). The black and white pictures I took look like something from the civil war era, which is apropro since where this shot was taken is exactly where a battle was fought during the civil war. Not hard to imagine, is it? I'm glad the holidays are over and now I can get on with my winter obsessions, which so far have included puppies, trailers, and blue purses.

getting better

2008-12-22T22:30:00.002-05:00

I'm getting better, my mother is getting better and one day I look forward to feeling less stressed and more rested. I'm still spending most waking hours with her, but a little less each day as she becomes more able to do things for herself. Mostly, I want to be available so she doesn't do things that she shouldn't. It's easy to over-extend oneself in this situation. You think, hey, I can put my pants on like I used to...only you can't and you fall down. Or you try to carry a glass of water while relying on a walker at the same time. But she's doing well and I have no doubt that in the near future she will be as independent as ever. Her mind is good. Still some memory problems, but nothing major.

Today I went out with the family for a quick lunch and a shopping trip to Target. It was overwhelming with too many choices, and people and stuff stuff stuff. I got a few things, but gave up on trying to find exactly what I was looking for. Tomorrow I go to the grocery store!

My sister-in-law will be doing all of our Christmas Eve dinner. All of it. It's a gift to us and it's a great idea. So, I only have to worry about the Christmas Day dinner with the in-laws. I can handle it. I'm past, way past, being too invested in anything, so the pressure is off. Merry Christmas.

a week's difference

2008-12-16T22:41:00.002-05:00

So, Mom is better. Not altogether back with it, but much better. She is talking more normally but weakley, she stands with assistance, she has just gotten to the point of being able to slowly feed herself, she is able to follow conversations a little better BUT she is still somewhat delusional, easily confused, unable to process, and a little more wearing on the nerves. At times she's a little giddy. She sounds like she's making really good sense, but then you realise she's making up what she doesn't know. She doesn't ever know the day or date. She thinks there are geese outside her hospital door and she wants me to catch one for her to cook for Christmas. If she were thinking logically she would conclude that, 'hey, maybe it doesn't make sense that geese would be running around a hospital hallway.' If she hears someone laugh in the hallway, she says it must be because a goose pooped on them. She insists that a few nights ago she went out the door to a table and chairs and sat for hours. Nevermind that at that point she couldn't even sit without being held up, she doesn't have a door that leads to the outside, and the only window just looks out onto the roof below. She insisted that I look out of the window at the table and chair that don't exist except in her mind. When I dutifully looked, told her that they were not there, she said someone must have stolen them.

The other night she managed to get her hospital gown off and throw it on the floor. I was tired, it was nearly 10pm, I covered her up and told the nurse on my way out that she was naked. I couldn't reason or wrestle with her any more that day. The next morning she was still naked. I got one of her pj tops from home and she put it on and seemed happier. I think it was partly a control issue which I understand from someone who hasn't had control of one single bodily function in 5 weeks, and it was partly the crazies and a sudden obsession with how much material was in one of the hospital gowns. She threw her sheets and pillows into the floor also, and refused a blanket. So, I took fleece throws from her house to her. She is sleeping under those. Tonight we managed to get a full set of pj's on her. The only other area that she can really control is her eating. She won't eat the hospital food or food that I take her. She wants her own cooking. I understand that. I really do. But it is like having a 3 year old with Alzheimers...part opp defiant, and part not thinking too well.

Today I was worn out. Yesterday too, come to think of it. But, there is an end in sight. The doctor said yesterday that he can envision her discharge after this weekend. I couldn't believe it. This has been going on so long it just seemed like it would continue forever. My life would consist of work and hospital. But, now I have hope that things will normalize at some point in the future. It sounds silly I know, but I hadn't really gotten my mind around the possibility that this wouldn't continue for the rest of my natural life. I think I'm really really tired and I'll feel better when I can relax a bit. And, I'm really grateful that mom is better.

things are kind of looking up

2008-12-09T01:11:00.000-05:00

Here's a picture of my Mom. She's been in the hospital now for 30 days, 18 of those spent in ICU. She's still in ICU, but word from the nurse is that she will get sprung tomorrow to a regular room. Physically, she is doing well. She has been able to come off the ventilator, her breathing is good, her innerds are all working and she seems to be rallying. Her mind left her, though, some time back. I know exactly when it happened. I have been at the hospital no less than twice a day, and for many days, all day, since she enrolled there. She was initially always responsive to me. Always. Then one day, she wasn't. It happened a week ago last Saturday. It was a marked change. She no longer squeezed my hand, she didn't open her eyes much, and when she did it was with a very unfocused, fleeting gaze. I was a bit worried that she'd had a stroke or something. I kept asking the nurses if she was responding to them. She wasn't. She seemed to sleep more.

So, as she began to show physical signs of improvement, she was less aware, less engaged, less responsive to any stimulation. Then, finally this past Saturday, she was successfully extubated (off the vent) and breathing on her own. The diprivan she had been getting for the past 17 days to keep her comfortable and sedated, was discontinued to make sure she was awake enough to breathe and respond. When I walked in the room a few hours later during visiting time, she brightened up and said, "You wouldn't believe what these people have done to me!" and that was the last coherent thing I heard from her. I tried to explain, as had the nurse, that she was in the ICU and had been there for quite awhile and that it was now December. She was unable to sustain attention to the shortest of explanations. She was gone baby gone. So, things got worse. She became agitated, tried to break the finger of a nurse, pinched another nurse (it WAS a cute male nurse), and spent much of her time moaning and writhing in the bed. Only restraints on her arms kept her from doing more damage. She required more sedation. This morning, when I called from work, the day nurse said that they had called in a neurologist to assess her to see if she'd had a stroke. I was pretty doggone sure it wasn't a stroke. This was ICU-crazy, dementia, delirium.

So the neurologist, a handsome laid back kind of guy, ordered an EEG and CT scan today. When I went in this evening, he told me that she had not had a stroke, and this was stress. I told him I agreed with his diagnosis. They had given her Haldol at my urging earlier today, and she had become a bit more lucid, but developed restlessness. She was actually much better with me today. She was able to pay attention but she said very little. Her speech is all run together, quiet, and sounds like she's had a stroke or a hearing loss. She nodded her head most of the time when I asked her a question. She rolled her eyes, made good eye contact, and attempted a couple of smiles at my lame jokes. I closed the sliding door to block out some of the ICU noise, closed the curtains to some of the stimulation, and talked quietly to her about everyday things, grandchildren, weather, meals I cooked over the weekend. I think it helped. The EPS was the most bothersome thing. Just before I left, the nurse gave her some paid meds and she settled down. I had unstrapped one of her hands, and I left it unstrapped. She was able to lie on her side, and at least that gave her some control where she hasn't had any at all over her body for the past month.

So, the good news, is she gets to go to a regular hospital room tomorrow. I'm going to take off from work and spend the day with her, and the night too, if she needs it, and see if I can't get a little more normalcy in her life.

This ICU delirium occurs in up to 80% of intubated ICU patients. Most of the time it's a quiet, withdrawn type of delirium but sometimes it's this more agitated or mixed state. It usually goes away when the patient gets out of ICU and most return to normal functioning. It's under-recognized and not always preventable when it's a choice between saving a life or having a crazy person emerge. Hopefully, we are coming to the end of this saga.

November and now December

2008-12-02T22:59:00.002-05:00

I am still spending time at the hospital, but not nearly as much as I was. I went back to work this week. It's been good for my mental health, I think, but I have less of a feel for what's going on at the hospital, and that raises my anxiety.

My mother is still on a ventilator, still heavily sedated but seems to be very slowly improving medically. My current worries are: a) they won't be able to get her off the vent tomorrow and she'll have to have a trach, b) that something has happened to her brain or cns and herself (consciousness) isn't going to return, c) that she'll be furious about all of this and will never forgive us.

Actually, it's b that's worried me for the past 24 hours or so. Up until yesterday she was still responsive and able to nod her head, squeeze my hand, and respond to verbal commands from the nurses. I see her only two or three times a day, so my gauge is maybe not very accurate. On Sunday she was asleep each time I saw her. On Monday, she was awake and squeezed my hand and looked intently but didn't really respond like she had in the past, ie, she didn't nod or shake her head when asked a question. It was like she didn't hear me. Today she had her eyes closed, did not respond to my voice or touch and pretty much seemed unconscious. A nurse explained that they had been messing with her and she was worn out but I really want to know if she's still in there. Through all the days and weeks now in the hospital I have dwelled on the possibility of her death and even planned her funeral on a few low days, I have been relieved and joyous at her small steps of improvement, but I never really thought about what happens if she isn't there...mentally gone, unable to recover and care for herself again. She looks better physically (if you ignore the tube in her mouth, the one in her nose, the various IV's in her neck and arms, the tape wrapped all the way around her head, the strip taped to her forehead, not to mention the Foley catheter and wrist restraints) and that makes her lack of response harder to imagine. But not so hard that I haven't worried about it all day. Like most worries in my life, I just want to know. I want an answer. I want to deal with it, make a plan, get it resolved, fixed. I'm tired of patience and I'm tired of hospitals. I'm tired of the waiting room (today I was treated to a man explaining to someone that if he went to a certain someone's house he could be "sent away again for a minimum of 12 years on federal charges." Drugs, I'm thinking...and he went on and on about "Darlene's blood sugar was over 700..." ) but mostly, I guess I'm just tired. And I miss my mother and I want her to wake up and act normal and be healthy and go home where she belongs.

humor counts

2008-11-28T23:26:00.002-05:00

I'm still spending my days in an ICU waiting room. I think it's been 8-plus days now. For the most part, the other family members there have been thoughtful, pleasant and quiet. My brother was here for a few days and that made the time there considerably better, but when he left, things got harder. No one to give reality checks to, no one to make fun of other people, and the little tad of privacy that we had managed to claim was taken over by a very large family who needed it more. The time goes by quickly on most days. Surprisingly quickly. At 8:30am we have the first visit. Mom has been asleep for the past 3 days at that time. My visit is brief, I check with the nurse to see how the night went, I look at all the tubes, monitors and medicines, check the oxygen level on the ventilator, make sure her feet are warm, and then exit. I read the paper, crochet for awhile, and then it's 12:30 and time for the next visit. Mom has been awake for this time for the past few days, and this is the hardest one of the day. She tries to communicate, but can't. I don't know what to do to help her. She squeezes my hand and pats it but there's little expression in her face. I don't know what is really "her" and what is sedation. I don't know what she's thinking or feeling. I don't know if she's in pain, or given up, or beyond feeling much. I spend the 30 minutes trying to understand her hand gestures, rubbing her feet, and dabbing a sponge on a stick into water and putting it in her mouth. I leave in tears, unable to speak.

Then there's lunch, hopefully a doctor will find me and give me an update (usually translated into 'no change'), and then more crochet, a few phone calls, and then it's 5:30 and another visiting time. She's usually asleep and I'm guiltily relieved. Then it's time for dinner, or sometimes I just hang out more and watch TV and crochet. Then the 8:30 visit, when she's usually asleep and I check in with the night nurse for any changes, hope, glimmers of improvement. Then home. While I drive home, I call my aunt, my mother's only remaining sister, who is 87 and give her the day's update. She is sweet, encouraging and thanks me for keeping her updated.

This is hell. I don't know what to do differently. I can't do anything else. I can't continue doing normal work or Saturday errands or shopping, but I can't keep this up for much longer either. I'm exhausted. Normally, I'm not a tearful person but now I tear up if someone just asks me how she is or if I find myself thinking about what might happen in the next days or weeks.

There was one bright point today that stood out. An elderly man in the waiting room who has a terminally ill wife in the ICU started the day today by telling me about his dream last night. He dreamed that the authorities came to him and told him that he had been neglecting his two young children. He felt terrible about it and told them that he had forgotten that he had two young kids. The authorities told him that he needed to put sweet potato lined underwear on them.

We both had a much needed chuckle over that.

waiting room hell

2008-11-23T22:29:00.002-05:00

I'm still living in hospital-world. My mother has now had two surgeries and is in intensive care, although she is slowly getting better. For the first 12 days, she was in a regular hospital room, which meant that I had use of her bathroom, a couple of chairs, and plenty of space and privacy. I could shut out most of the noise and interact only when I chose. After the second surgery, she unexpectedly had some problems that required the ICU, so I lost the room, privacy, space, and relative quiet.

Now my days are spent in a waiting room designated for those with family in the ICU. Most families stay part of the day, or are there only just prior to the 4 visiting times allowed each day. I am there much more than that, usually about 11-12 hours a day. There are no barriers to the grief, tragedy and sadness that enter the room. There is (thankfully) some humor also.

One torn up family lost their 50-something year old mother suddenly after they found her collapsed and not breathing at home. Her very young adult children were uncomprehending and the uncomprehending father was struggling to comfort the children and manage his own grief. It was really sad to hear the father explain to one of the children about how the mother wanted cremation, despite their reservations about it. The family was called into the ICU cubicle to say their goodbyes. I saw the obit in the paper today.

One of the irritating things is the people who enter the waiting room and talk loudly into cell phones to tell everyone about what has happened to uncle, or grandmother or papa and then they have loud obnoxious cell phone rings that go off every few minutes. Most follow up the news with tales of their own poor health. Yesterday I was treated to too much information regarding yellow 'places' on a woman's 'laig'. And then overhearing the conversation from her father-in-law to someone on the other end of a cell phone about how she is 'slow' and that her husband didn't know she was that way until after he had married her. He probably has a clue about it now seeing as how she apparently let him lie on the floor in a diabetic coma for a couple of days before she thought of calling her father-in-law to see if she should do something for him. I'd say the man is lucky to be alive.

This morning I was treated to a lecture from an older man to an older woman about the state of her finances. Their relationship was unknown, but I'm guessing they were brother and sister. The man repeatedly told her she needed a budget and needed to stick to it. She didn't argue or disagree, but somehow at her age I don't think she's likely to change her ways.

This evening I heard about a "saddleback bloodclot in the lung" that is plaguing a man, but I also heard about the big dinner he was able to eat so I think he's probably going to make it. I even ran into someone I know, who is there because of his 98 year old mother, who is doing pretty well and seems likely to recover.

Hopefully, my own mother will get well enough this week to go into a regular room and I can have my little bit of space back. I also miss her ability to make the best of a bad situation. I'm having some trouble doing that on my own without her.

hospital world

2008-11-19T14:33:00.002-05:00

My mother is still ill and in the hospital. She got better, then worse, then better, and now I'm not so sure. I missed 6 days of work and returned yesterday. What a relief. Work is soooo much easier than sitting at the hospital. But, today I worked this morning, and was needed back at the hospital for the afternoon/evening. And I'm waiting on the doctor, yet again.

By and large, the nurses have been very good. Some of the younger, newer ones without confidence were a little hard to take and became easy targets for my mother's biting sarcasm. For example: "Are your legs and feet swollen?" got a reply along the lines of, "I don't know, I can't see them, you tell me." I don't envy nurses and their jobs. Hard jobs.

Pain management has been interesting. In the past Mom has had morphine after surgery, but she always complained that it gave her nightmares. This time, they used dilaudid. She can't remember the name and calls it "dilly-doo" or "diddly-doo". but it makes her much happier.

my knight

2008-11-12T23:51:00.000-05:00

This is him in his favorite hat at the beach with spyglasses on the deck. My love.

The past few days have been a blur. My mom has been in the hospital, which means I have too. Hospital world is a parallel universe. The air is dry, the noises are way too personal and private to share but everyone does (conversations about bodily functions that aren't functioning, hacking, spitting, vomiting, crying), and many people who enter the room and use hand sanitizer like the patient is toxic waste, and the endless waiting for the doctor.

I've learned to temporarily seal off an NG tube (nasal-gastric for you neophytes), move an IV pole, reset the IV, measure pee in ml, adjust the bed, TV and lights using the bedframe controls, weigh the patient in kg or lbs while they lie in bed, and how to live without food or sleep for many many hours at a time. I've read two and a half books, crocheted 2 scarves, and leaped up out of the chair about 600 times. I've eaten hospital food, restaurant food, and no food.

But, she's getting better and may get to go home in a few days. And then so will I.

election reflection

2008-11-05T22:43:00.002-05:00

Last night was great. Unexpectedly moving, funny, sobering, slightly drunken, sweet. At my house friends came to eat hotdogs, drink 'nutty bitches', eat dessert and watch the returns. When it was announced at 11pm that Obama had clearly won, we all cheered and were happy. As the reality of the moment set in, we became somber and thoughtful. By the time we saw the thousands of people in Grant Park, we were tearful. Obama's speech topped it off.

I like politics and my parents were always interested in politics, so I've sat through conventions and election returns all of my life. I even have a great picture of my mother dressed up as Lady Bird Johnson (whom she resembled) in the 60's for a part she played in a local play. I was jubilant when Clinton won, I was dejected and unbelieving when Reagan won, I took Carter's victory for granted as my right as a first time voter, and I was angry at W's stolen election, but none of those elections moved me like the one last night. I didn't anticipate the effect it would have on me and so many others. I completely underestimated the importance of Obama being ELECTED by a clear majority of voters. And despite a little bit of gloating, there's a tinge of sadness that H. Clinton wasn't up there, or another woman. Part of me feels that there's more women than black men and that it was OUR turn first, but then I think that maybe this is how it has felt to many black Americans for years...hopeful and a little disappointed at the same time. Hopeful that just maybe this person will be able to make some important changes and disappointed that those changes won't come faster and won't be in all the areas that need to be changed.

But mostly, I'm proud that we did it and satisfied that this is right.

Obama and the rest of the country now have a lot to live up to. For people of color there are no more excuses. A poor black man became President, so can you. For rednecks and racists, get over it or move. For his supporters, hunker down, it's not going to be a walk in the park.

And I'm really glad I don't have to look at McCain and Palin for the next four years.

2008-11-05T00:12:00.000-05:00

woo hoo!!!!!

drunk and confused

2008-10-26T20:47:00.000-04:00

The picture is from my recent trip to FL with some picasa inhancements.

I've spent the weekend selling crochet at a two day Octoberfest in town. It was a whole weekend used up, but it was lucrative and mostly very enjoyable, thanks to being busy, fabulous weather, friendly people, decent music, and seeing lots of people I know. The only part that wasn't so great was an encounter with a drunk woman. Here's the condensed version: I noticed a kind of disheveled looking woman staring at my stuff. She wandered my way and hiccuped, and then made a big deal of apologizing for it. She kept hiccuping and explaining about how she had had a mug of beer that was the size of a pitcher. She didn't want me to tell anyone she was drunk (like folks weren't going to notice..), she kept slapping me on the knee and getting up in my face and rambling about how drunk she was. She would turn as if to leave, then pick up something and return to me to exclaim about how cheap the prices were, and how if only I took check cards she would spend all of her money, etc. etc. Then she grabbed a scarf and draped it around a stranger who was walking past the booth. My attention was briefly, very briefly diverted to a customer. The transaction was done in seconds and by that time the drunk woman and her scarfed new friend were standing in front of me wanting some paper to exchange phone numbers. The drunk woman went on and on about how I was a match-maker and that she hoped this woman would call her, etc. The other woman wrote down her number, put up the scarf and left. The drunk woman continued on and on about her chances with this stranger. About that time, a man and two little girls appeared. He was apparently the one who was with the drunk woman at the event. He didn't appear drunk and he was trying to get the drunk out of my booth. The drunk woman didn't want to leave, she introduced me to everyone present, whispered in my ear that the kids were stinkers but cute, and indicated that she didn't want to continue hanging around the man. He left, then returned a few minutes later and finally managed to pull her away. Whew! No damage done, but by this time I was backed up against a concrete wall, literally, trying to avoid several imagined scenarios (vomit, catching a falling person, stinky beer breath...). The thing that fascinated me was how in a matter of seconds these two women could figure out that hooking up with each other might be a desirable thing on both parts. What was the secret code or signal or glance? How in such a short period of time could they each ascertain that the other might be interested? I mean seconds! Talk about efficiency! It seems like when I was single years ago that it took more than seconds to figure out that someone might be giving 'come hither' looks. Like everything else, maybe that has speeded up too.

I felt kind of bad for all the parties involved. For the drunk woman who mostly looked pitiful, for the man who was most likely not aware that the girlfriend seemed to prefer women, and for the woman stranger who likely has no idea what she could be headed into. The potential for drama was pretty high, but I guess some people like a lot more drama than I do.

2008-10-21T17:15:00.000-04:00

This is a manatee at Wakulla Springs, FL. I was there last week and got to see several manatees, the first I've ever seen. They make their way up the Wakulla River each fall to the mouth of the spring. They are big blobs with noses. There were even two babies.

Florida was hot, sunny and a welcomed break. I can't gossip about my friends I went with, because some of them might read this and recognize themselves, but it was a good time and everyone got along. Remarkable, considering there were 8 people sharing a house. The house was beautiful, right on the ocean and far from any developments. I'm not going to tell you exactly where it was because then it would be discovered and everyone would want to go there. I'll keep it my secret for now.

One of the highlights was listening to a book on tape, "The Lovely Bones". It was on the bestseller lists a few years ago and one of my daughters read it a couple of years ago and really liked it. I bought a used copy of the CD's. The first 4/5ths of it was good but the last parts were not as interesting. There seemed to be a lot of missed opportunites for character development. Some of the characters seemed to play significant roles but they were not logically significant roles. The ending was gratuitous, as though the author had to wrap up everything in a hurry. But up until the end we enjoyed it. My carmates were eager to ride around so we could listen to it.

And now I'm back in real fall, corduroy pants and all.

decompressing in fall

2008-10-09T00:43:00.002-04:00

Today wasn't a very good day. It was mostly work stuff. Something that I thought would be easy and routine wasn't, due to people who thought they knew more than they did. It got my blood pressure up way too early in the day, and worst of all, it took me by surprise. It's one thing to anticipate conflict, but it's another whole deal to have it land on your head like an asteroid. I was floored, and couldn't seem to regroup all day long. Mainly because I didn't have time to regroup or process or think about it...I just had to keep going and going. And once something like that happens, it's like the Fates take advantage and more and more weird things happen. For example:

it had been raining all night and all morning. It had nearly stopped. I went outside to my car to get something and BOOM, a bolt of lightening nearly made me wet my pants. It was the only bolt of lightening that had occurred in 12 hours of rain.

In a casual conversation with 3 (three!) different people, at different times of the day, separately, they all cried. For good reasons, I'm sure, but the tears came easy today.

I couldn't seem to pick up on body language. I was flummoxed by my own events and couldn't seem to 'read' anybody. I felt out of kilter.

I had an ethical dilemma. I received written information that I shouldn't have, but it would have made for some juicy reading. Although I think it was given to me intentionally, I don't think it's appropriate for me to read it or have access to it. I intend to give it back, but it's tempting to peek..but I won't.

Intensity. WAy too much of it today.

So, when I left work I had planned to go to the grocery store. I turned my car in that direction and when I got to the store, I just kept on driving. I was in no way ready to focus on groceries or deal with the social climate of a store. I decided I needed down time. Driving is very relaxing to me, so I just kept going. I drove for an hour. For the first half hour, I was lost. I knew that eventually I would come to something that I recognized but I enjoyed the journey until I got there. The leaves had suddenly started to turn. I was on winding country roads with trees close in, a few horses in fields, barns and interesting old houses. I had 3 phone calls in 30 minutes and had fun relating how lost I was. When I finally got to a road I recognized, I took it and went home. I was in a much better frame of mind, which was a good thing because the intensity of the day continued, but I had enough spare gas in my reserves to deal with it. I felt proud of handling my stress in the way I did, and I can't wait to get lost again. And I finally did go to the store late at night, and it wasn't even crowded.

rudeness abounds and thoughts thereof

2008-09-29T20:25:00.003-04:00

Yesterday while conducting a small transaction, this young, snotty teenager was rude to me. Really rude. I had done nothing to provoke this in her. She obviously didn't feel well at all, and instead of going home or getting a grip, she took out some of her annoyance on me. It's been a while since I wanted to slap someone cross-eyed, but it did cross my mind. But I didn't and I remained pleasant until I could get away.

Then today, I emailed a business with a question. Two people read the email and replied. One of them was helpful and answered my question and the other responded with unnecessary sarcasm and gave a conflicting answer. I didn't do anything except ask a question in a very nice tone. This is a business? And these two people can't communicate with each other to tell me the same answer? Or decide which one of them gets to answer (preferably without the sarcasm). So now I want this guy to eat shit and die, and I don't even know him and he doesn't know me. I'm really sorry if this was the 30th time he'd answered the question, but that's no excuse for rudeness. Like I said, there's rarely a good excuse for rudeness. Sometimes brutal honesty can be mistaken for rudeness, but that's usually only a last resort and only if the honest opinion is invited. Otherwise, lying is preferred. But going out of your way to make someone feel less, feel bad, feel irritating- is rude. And it's bad karma.

Most of us have plenty of opportunities to be rude on a daily basis, especially if we work with the public but isn't it better for everyone to avoid the temptation to be rude? Isn't that obvious? And the rude people then blame other people for their unhappiness. Uh huh. It's karma. And if you are rude, you deserve what happens to you.

politics

2008-09-28T00:40:00.002-04:00

I really hate it when people say that they hate politics. It's like hating gossip, or spring, or newspapers. It's a given. It's a game. One with consequences maybe, but still a game. So, this week I've spent countless hours listening to CNN/MSNBC and even Fox occasionally to hear that same talking heads talk and talk and talk. It's fascinating to me. And I really don't know much about politics...but I like forming opinions and I like hearing the analysis from the talking heads. I also volunteered at the Obama headquarters which happens to be very close to my house for two evenings this week, making phone calls. It's more fun than it sounds like. Most people are very nice, even if they disagree with Democrats. That's a good thing about living in the South. There are very few occasions when it's permissable to be rude. Pissed off and catty maybe...but hardly ever rude.

The most fascinating thing to me this week has been the quick demise of Sarah Palin. What an idiot. How could McCain choose her? My theory is that he went off script and choose her impulsively before anyone from his campaign had a chance to check her out. She's crumbling under the pressure and doesn't look like she's got the chops or the smarts to rally. I looked at CafePress for anti-Palin bumperstickers and there were some great ones, like: Sarah Palin is an idiot (my personal favorite-direct and to the point), and something about Wasilla needing their village idiot back, and "my border collie is smarter than Sarah Palin" and so on. I hope the press stay on her. And kudos to Katie Couric for her interview. I'm not a KC fan, but I enjoyed her style in contrast to Palin's.

And god bless ted kennedy...who had a seizure but insisted on getting home in time for the debates. Now there's a Democrat to be damn proud of!

hats

2008-09-21T21:24:00.002-04:00

Next Sunday I start selling at the market. I sell my crocheted items to make enough money to buy the yarn to make more crocheted items. It's not really a money maker, but it lessens the cost of the hobby a little. So, in preparation, I've been making hats as fast as I can this weekend. They are addictive to make and wear and the yarn is so appealing that I love making them. I bought myself a new jacket for the winter (red red red) so I guess I'm gonna have to break down and make myself a new hat to go with the coat. Last year I made a great hat that I wore a lot. A whole lot since I don't have much hair and my head gets really cold, but then I went and washed it and it shrank (didn't follow my own directions), so now I don't have a cool hat. But, I just had a birthday and I got an unexpected gift certificate to Hobby Lobby, so I think I might just go buy myself some fancy yarn and make myself a hat to go with my new coat and I'll be styling.

but for now I"m just making hats like mad.

change of air

2008-09-16T19:06:00.000-04:00

Finally, the humidity has lessened, the weather is cool enough to open the windows, and there is a promise of fall. My favorite time of year. I wish I could spend it in New England.

TV and whatever

2008-09-03T17:51:00.002-04:00

So, the no TV thing lasted about 5 days. Couldn't stand it. It seemed like those Judge/courtroom shows were on all the time and that's really depressing. Poor people with a grudge and not even sense enough to avoid the wrath of an irritable TV judge. So Dish network came out, installed a box that includes DVR, a new dish in the backyard and we are rolling in channels again. At least for now we've got all these extra movie channels, and some soft porn stuff late at night. It's about as interesting as the courtroom shows....basically shows boobies and men who are interested in them. And they aren't even great looking boobies. Enough of my TV world.

For two days in a row people have wished me happy birthday (which isn't til next week) so it's beginning to feel like my birthday.

aint got no tv

2008-08-18T01:13:00.002-04:00

I aint' got no good tv. I've been watching the Olympics voraciously for a week, and suddenly, I can't get to them. I have had Directv for 9 years and been pretty pleased with it, then today some of the channels wouldn't work. This happened a couple of months ago and they told me what to do and I did it and it fixed it. Today, instead of telling me what to do, they wanted to collect more money from me for a service call, AND sell me 'protection plan package' which means I pay a less in a service call, but still more per month for the same thing I've been getting. So, after a bit of wrangling, I cancelled Directv. DO YOU HEAR THAT DIRECTV? YOU COULD HAVE KEPT ME AS A GOOD CUSTOMER IF YOU HADN'T BEEN SO GREEDY!

but now I can't watch the Olympics until I get some rabbit ears. I hate the local cable company. Really hate them, so they are out of the question. Next year, there should be an alternative, but who knows when that might happen. Intellectually, I know it's probably a good thing that I will watch less TV, but intellectually it's bad because I'll watch worse TV. We tried this once before when switching from cable to satellite and it was awful.

So another business has lost my business. They probably don't care, but here's the list:

Capital Toyota
Economy Honda
Comcast
DirecTV
Yellow Deli
EXXON
that's all I can think of.

grouchy.

secrets

2008-08-11T22:15:00.000-04:00

I have no idea why this sign says what it does, or why there's a security person and an Italian Stallion standing by it. I took this shot in NYC about 3 weeks ago. It's a secret why someone cut a hole, painted and labeled the two pipes on a random street. Someone's sense of humor? Maybe. Something serious? Maybe. I don't think so, but maybe. An insult to Siamese people? I hope not. I have no good theories about this.

Which brings me to todays theme. Secrets. I was the recipient today of secrets. The repository was open, I guess. All day at work, people kept coming to me to confide things. Nothing earth shattering (at least not to me) and nothing especially good or bad, but they were personal, touchy things and people seemed to want to share them with me. I won't tell them though. I can keep confidences but it's more fun to gossip. But I won't.

2008-08-06T20:14:00.000-04:00

I was in Manhattan recently. We were driving to MA and decided to drive through the city. Here's a scene from either Broadway or 8th Ave. looking uptown. I enjoyed it, but then I wasn't driving. Manhattan is an exciting place, but I wouldn't want to live there. I did live there briefly many years ago. The grey faces of the people bothered me and the bracing-for-anything I had to do every day when I left the apt. I still like to visit, though not as much as I used to. On this journey we drove through the Holland Tunnel and up Manhattan to the Bronx. It was slow and I wouldn't do it again, but since it was on a Saturday the traffic wasn't horrible. It's a weird place to live...so separated from nature, yards, soft ground, trees, quietness. And the past few times I've been there, I've noticed that NYC is turning into a giant mall. They have the same big box stores as every other place in America, only they still have many thousands of the little places, too. For now.

camping quandry

2008-07-15T23:51:00.000-04:00

I love camping and it is my preferred way to spend down time. I have camped for weeks at a time and enjoyed every second of it. We sold our camper last year however and haven't camped for a long while until last weekend. I did major internet shopping and bought a mega-tent, mega-cots, new dishes, tupperware glasses, a portable kitchen table thingy and even a new tablecloth. The yuppies went rustic camping (compared to our camper-camping). It was a lot of work. DH did most of the work. It was very humid and rained a lot. I enjoyed it and slept well, thanks to the cot, but everything was a little more problematic than I wanted it to be. I missed having hot water and a sink and an ac.

Upon returning home, we discussed getting a motorcycle camper. They are tiny enough for a motorcycle to pull them (or my Prius) and it's basically a bed with a little standing room to change clothes or set a chair. It's very appealing. Even more appealing is getting a camper and parking it somewhere and visiting it regularly.

Looking for exactly the right situation. But I would still rather camp than stay in a hotel. Later this week I leave on a couple of trips and will spend 8 out of 9 nights in motel/hotels. I'm looking forward to the trips, but not all the strange beds.

camping

2008-06-29T13:48:00.000-04:00

These are more scenes from trip to Montana. The color of the water is an odd grey-green, from the snow melt sediment, I guess.

For the past week I have been seriously collecting camping gear. A long time ago I first camped without even a tent, using only a piece of clear plastic that I fashioned into a tarp by rolling up rocks in the corners, tying them with twine and stringing from trees. After a few years, I bought a used tent from a friend. That later led to a bigger tent once I was married and had 3 babies to take along. Then a pop-up camper that was one of the most beloved posessions of my life. Then a series of travel trailers, and then nothing. No camper, or trailer or even a plastic home-made tarp.

So, now we've decided to camp again, really camp in a tent. But we didn't have one and being of advancing age and decreptitude, we opted for luxury in the form of cots, an attached screen house, and lots of new stuff. The brand spanking new tent should arrive this week in it's 10x16 ft. glory with two sky-lights, a hole for the electric extention cord, and room for the brand spanking new cots. They have already arrived and are massive. 45" wide and rated up to 600lbs. There should be room for two cots inside the tent, if we stow our clothes underneath the bed. Then, there's the Kansas City something-team table. Really, it's called a tail-gaters table, but for an unknown reason, the logo table for KC was $30 cheaper than anything else. Not being loyal to any sort of team made it an easy decision and now the camping neighbors will think we're from Kansas. Then there's the pots, pans, dishes, silverware, water jugs, dishpan, coffee pots and all the other things that a car camper needs. I've been to most of the goodwill, salvation army resale stores in town and ebay is more familiar to me than ever. I've got some cool stuff, but the prize so far in cool is the set of Tupperware hourglass salt/pepper shakers I got for 59 cents at Goodwill.

The coffeepots have been problematic, but the problem is the unexpected abundance. I had an old coffeepot used throughout all the camping incarnations, but it was rusty. It was a black enamelware, chipped pot with no innerds. I found one on ebay that came with 3 enamelware cups and one plate. I won the bid, and it should be on it's way. Then DH said he preferred stainless steel. So I went to Amazon and bought an excellent appearing one and it should be on it's way. Then yesterday, at a lucky yardsale, a woman was going out of the camping business and she had a blue enamelware coffeepot for $2. How could I pass that up? (if you are losing count, we're up to 3 new pots and one old rusty one). And then, rummaging in our storage area, BIG enamelware coffeepot number 5 turned up. In keeping with the 60's theme I seem to have going, I'm seriously looking for the pastel Tupperware glasses of my youth. I'm watching a few auctions on ebay for those.

This is where I live

2008-06-26T00:03:00.000-04:00

...although I don't have this view from my house, it gives a pretty good idea of the beauty of the area. Like hair, people always want what they don't have. If you have curly hair, you want straight, and if you have brown hair, you want blonde. If you live where there are mountains and trees, you long for sight distance and more sky. If the country were smaller, all of that could be in the same geographic area and maybe we'd all be satisfied. But probably not.

more pictures from glacier and north dakota

2008-06-18T03:40:00.000-04:00

I love stark-looking pictures. I don't know why. My favorite artists are ones like Hopper and Wyeth who show barebones or lots of emptiness. I'm not an artist and haven't taken any art classes since 9th grade, so I may not be using the right terms for what I'm describing, but it's the possibilities that the pictures have in them that keeps my eye focused on them. I guess that's why I like the plains so much. I can't understand why people say that it is boring. Although I've never lived there, I have spent weeks at a time looking across the landscapes and I enjoyed every second of it. And if it has cows around, all the better.

pictures from my trip to Montana

2008-06-17T03:04:00.000-04:00

gay marriage

2008-06-15T18:44:00.000-04:00

this is another picture from MT, i could happily live in the middle of that field.

Tomorrow, same sex marriage becomes legal again in California. Not only for Californians, but everyone else who choses to go there to get married. If I were gay and in a committed relationship, I'd be on the plane for California tomorrow, (or maybe today). It is unbelieveable to me that people who love each other can not legally marry each other. It's a civil rights issue, a constitutional issue, and a moral issue that should outrage everyone.

I work with someone who identifies herself as a Republican. There are actually a few Republicans that I like a lot, and I'm always surprised when I do. In a conversation about a gay co-worker, this Republican said sincerely and regretfully that it was too bad that this other co-worker did not have the same freedom to share his private life and partner with people like the rest of us do. I told her that she didn't sound like much of a Republican. She laughed, and insisted that she is a Republican, but she didn't sound too convincing.

My point is that it's changing. Everyone knows gay people, everyone has gay people in their family (whether they know it or not) and maybe someday soon the legal discrimination will cease. And then we can work on the personal discrimination and prejudices.

North Dakota

2008-06-14T01:08:00.000-04:00

Here is the first of many many pictures from my recent Amtrak trip. It was the first time I'd spent a long time on a train, and it was a long time travelling from TN to MT and back in 6 days. The best part was being relaxed and rested once I got across the country and the speed of travel without being on a stupid airplane. The worst part was having to sit with different strangers at every meal and make the same small talk each time. Where are you from, where are you going, where have you been....and so on. I really disliked it. There was one person I wanted to slap and choke after she started talking about how we should be drilling for oil everywhere in this country because of the price of gas. Most of the people were benign, and a couple were really interesting, but some were plumb annoying.

Train travel is a good thing but Amtrak trains are worn out and need some overhauling. They need more trains, more routes and to be made a priority in mass transit. All the trains we were on (4), were really full and were so full the staff seemed stressed and the dining car had trouble keeping up and kept running out of food. As a sleeper car passenger we were considered First Class and got special treatment, priority seating for meals, snacks, champagne, wine and cheese tastings, cookies and lots of attention from the car attendant. That part was fun. The sleeping part was great after the first night. On the first night we were on a shorter train to Chicago and too close to the front and the train horn, which they blew almost constantly as we crossed roads. I couldn't get used to the horn, but after that with Benadryl and ear plugs, I slept like a baby, only better. I still want someone to come shake my bed all night so I can get that train sensation.

fields of the wood and visa versa

2008-06-01T18:49:00.000-04:00

There is a place not too far from here called Fields of the Wood. Maybe it's a bibical reference, i don't know, but it's very bizarre. It's really far away from any towns or many homes and it's in the hills of N.C. Suddenly you come across this big white arch over a little road, and looking up the road about a quarter mile is a whole bunch of hillsides covered with things from the bible. This is a shot of the 10 commandments. If I'd turned the other way, there was the tomb that Jesus was buried in and a big white wheel that he rolled away to escape. There's a pool for baptisms, churches, gardens and other assorted buildings. It covers many acres and a horseshoe shaped cove of hills. People go to look around, climb the many steps to the top of this hill, have picnics, and I don't know what-all. I had always heard of it, but never seen it for myself. Now I have.

Tomorrow we leave for our train trip. First, we drive across the state to the train station. The train station in Memphis is not being used right now because of a sinkhole, so we are catching the train in Newbern, TN in the middle of the night. Then on to Chicago by Tues. morn then after a few hours, on to Montana. Lots of pics when I return, promise.

yee haw

2008-05-19T23:54:00.000-04:00

This is the only good shot I got at the Franklin, TN rodeo last Friday night, but you get the idea. I love rodeos. There aren't that many here in the east. This was the first one I had ever been to that was indoors. I prefer the outdoors much better, but it was a cool night, so being inside had it's advantages. The hokeyness factor was high, patriotism abounded, but the announcer was very good and the bronc bustin was real. The best part was when they had the mutton bustin'. I had never seen that before. They got 10 little kids, 10 sheep, and put helmets and vests on the kids. Then the kids laid down on top of the sheep hugging the neck, and rode as long as they could. It was great. The roping was not so good, but the fun factor was there. And hotdogs.

side roads

2008-05-13T21:09:00.000-04:00

you got your baptists and your side baptists...I guess...whatever that means.

Today's theme is noise. Whenever I have a migraine, I get more sensitive to noise, but I'm pretty sensitive to noise anyway. I listen to TV down really low, unless it's a movie with variable sound and I have to turn it up not to miss the low parts. Really, if I walk out of the room, I can't even hear that I have the TV on from the other room. At work there are loud intercoms, loud buzzers, and loud kids. I can usually tune most of it out except for the intercom and bells that are REALLY loud. Today there was a more subtle noise that persisted all day and drove me NUTS. It was a vibration noise, like an old car that rattles, only it came from the pipes that cross the ceiling. I don't know why they made that noise or why it made that noise more today than other days. I don't know what starts the rattle, where it comes from exactly, or why it drives me NUTS, but there it is. All day long. I think my nerves were jangled, so that now, in the evening, when I should be relaxing after chili and ice-cream, I'm annoyed by the helicopter that just flew over, the airplane I can hear in the distance that seems to be out of tune, the clacking of a calculator, the mutterings of someone as thay clack on the calculator, and the phone ringing that seems inordinately loud. I want to put on earphones. I feel a little autistic. I'm hypersensitive to the point that I can't even watch TV. And I don't even have a migraine.

I can usually tune out things pretty well and I'm not typically easily distracted, but some days the sound of the world is too much. I think sound pollution is way underestimated. That, and light pollution. So many trees have been cut down in my neighborhood that it is much noisier than it used to be. I can hear boats, trains, traffic, dogs, sirens that I couldn't hear before.

One summer in Wyoming I heard two sirens in 6 weeks. It was great. I'm ok with the quiet.

today i've been busy

2008-05-10T00:14:00.000-04:00

Ok. Let me catch you up on my life. Here's today. I worked, ate chicken, got an oil change, took my mother to dinner for early mother's day, made about 7 phones calls regarding a day trip tomorrow with friends, played my new favorite game (flood it) and some roof rats, found strawberries to buy, drove about 100 miles although I worked only two blocks from home, reviewed files that were either boring or depressing, wrote emails of sympathy (to a boss), criticism (to a local dj) and praise (for a senator), ate more chicken, apoligized for an unintentional mistake at work, watched and read the news, and had 4 glasses of sweet tea.

The picture was taken by one of my daughters. She was in the southwest last week and took this at the bottom of the grand canyon. it's my new desktop picture. pretty, isn't it?

clover

2008-04-26T23:36:00.000-04:00

Here's a picture of our doggie, Clover. She's sick with cancer and probably won't live more than a few more days. She's been down for a few weeks now, and it took about 2 weeks of testing and medication attempts before she was diagnosed. Each day she has less energy, but her sweet disposition is still with her. She doesn't appear to be in any pain and she's still eating. Mostly she just sleeps, but when she's awake she's very alert. Mainly, she is just slowing down and I guess she'll continue until she just stops. She's taken a lot of pleasure in sitting on the front porch and walking around the yard without her leash (usually forbidden because she runs off).

Clover is a well-traveled dog. She's been to Florida, the mountains and Wyoming. She has traveled across the country in a truck. Her bed always traveled with her and she has slept in the camper with us since she was a pup. She's been a great watch dog, reminding me of "Nanna" from Peter Pan. She's never bitten anyone, but she would sure make you think she was going to. Especially if you were the UPS guy. More than one stranger has held the door closed to make sure she didn't go through it. I've felt safer since we've had her, especially at night. She has her own bed, but when no one watched her, she always creeped up onto the couch. We finally gave up and bought her a bed that fits on the couch and now it is her couch. She tolerates other people sitting on her couch, but only until she's ready to go to bed. Then she stands and stares and yips until the person moves over for her.

Clover really belongs to our youngest daughter. She was a rescued dog from a pound in another county. They found her at a dump. She was about 5 months old when we got her. She was thin and sickly looking, but actually she was just a worn out puppy. By the next day, she was her happy self. She was a mediocre student at discipline, but only because we were half-hearted mediocre teachers. She's been an important part of our family for 8 years now and we'll all miss her terribly.

mellow or not?

2008-04-12T02:28:00.000-04:00

I used to think that I was getting more mellow, and in some ways, I am, as I age. I'm less self-conscious, less critical of myself and other people, more forgiving and I sweat the little stuff a little less. Sometimes. And then, I think that I am more combative than I used to be because I just have to speak out when I think things are wrong. I do practice holding my tongue more, but I'm not really sure that it's a good thing. I don't know if this is mid-life angst, or just me. For example, yesterday at work I said that I would be glad when the news stopped talking about a certain local news story they've been reporting on for weeks. A woman I barely know and who seldom speaks at all, become very passionate and held what I thought was a pretty uninformed and indefensible position. I was surprised at her indignation on the issue. I wasn't disturbed by the story as much as bored and tired of hearing it beat into the ground. But, as I opened my mouth to state an opposing position, I glanced at the paper in front of me at my horoscope, which said I should not engage in arguments. I didn't. I closed my mouth and didn't say another word about it. It was a good move because nothing I said would have made a difference to someone who held a position so strongly.

But, when I think someone is being unfair, toward me or anyone else, it is really hard for me to hold my tongue. Really hard. I try to make sure that I have a vested interest before I speak up, and not get into territory that is none of my business, but I don't think I'm always successful. That can be pretty obnoxious, I think and maybe I should reel it in a little. But I can't anymore. It's like I'm out of control. I have to speak up or I don't know what will happen. It's a mission to set things right and leave the world a little better. But, it has it's price. I ruminate and spend too much time sweating the small stuff. Back to step one. So, maybe it's not age, just me after all.

But somewhere out there the sumbitches better straighten up!

I hate to sleep

2008-04-09T01:54:00.000-04:00

Have I mentioned this? I hate to go to sleep. I fight it like a little child. I want to stay up. There are too many things to do like crocheting, reading, watching TV, blogging, thinking, going places, playing Roof Rats, talking, sudoku.....it's a long list. I don't want to miss anything. I don't want to waste time sleeping. I'm not manic or anything, it's a conscious choice. I can fight sleep for really long periods of time. Routinely through the week I only get about 5-6 hrs of sleep. I have to get up early every Wednesday, so it's a 4-5 hr night for me, it looks like. If I didn't have to work, I'd stay up all night every chance I got, sleep all morning and then wonder where the day went. But it's not just that I like nighttime and being a night person...it's having more hours in my day to do the things I want to do. It's the 'go' gene I think in a different form. I just want to go and go and go. Right now, if I wasn't sleepy and if I didn't have to get up early tomorrow, I'd get in my car, drive to Sonic and get something to drink like a rootbeer (only they aren't open at 2am), then I'd go find a relatively safe place near a train track and I'd watch trains and listen to the scanner. Really. I did that this afternoon and it was fun. I only came home because I was hungry and it got dark. I'm ready for more, except I AM sleepy. It doesn't take much to entertain me.

3:10 to Yuma

2008-04-06T00:47:00.000-04:00

Picture from the beach at Tybee Island.

We watched "3:10 To Yuma" last weekend and it was really good. Probably everyone who is likely to see it has already seen it, so this isn't exactly a timely review, but whatever. Russell Crowe is hot hot hot. He's the baddest bad boy in a long time, on and off the screen. The movie is really interesting and addresses honor among thieves in some of it's themes. I don't recall ever seeing the original movie, but now I'd really like to. I lived in Yuma, AZ as a kid for several years. The only sort of tourist attraction there is the territorial prison. When I was a kid, it was pretty rustic, deteriorating and lacked much historical accuracy. It was privately owned and included a mummy (which turned out to be made of plaster and is now billed as an attraction in another part of AZ) and tiny fleas dressed up in people clothes such as wedding dresses and tuxes. The fleas were under glass and up at the front of the museum and a real highlight for kids. We took field trips to the museum every year. Yuma was not a big town then, and the museum was only about 3 blocks from my elementary school, and 6 blocks from my house, but it was a field trip, nonetheless. Nowadays, the prison museum is lacking the sleazey, decaying character it had in the 60's. It is owned by the state of AZ and it has brochures that don't include fake mummy pictures or fleas. It's sterile looking but at least now the inside part is air-conditioned. When I was a kid, they just left the door open all the time. I remember seeing the individual cave-like cells with clawed out semi-circles where the prisoners had tried to escape. There were also metal clamps and chains where prisoners were chained down, and a hole in the top of the cell where supposedly the rattlesnakes were dropped down on the prisoners. I don't know if that part was true, or part of the made up lore of the place, but it was fascinating for kids. I still have vivid mental images of those baked clay cells. If Russell Crowe had been there it would have been a different place. Did I mention how hot he is?

ethnic foods

2008-04-04T23:34:00.000-04:00

In the last 24 hours I've eaten Italian, Japanese, Mediterranean and Cuban food. It was all good, especially the Mediterranean and Japanese (sushi). I can remember when we didn't have all those choices here and it still makes me feel sophisticated to know a little bit about some of the choices available, even though my knowledge is very limited in most of those areas. For some reason, I am insanely drawn to hummus. Any kind, any flavoring. The kind I had tonight was about the best I've ever had. It had these little speckles of purple stuff sprinkled on it, and when I asked our waitress (who was of unknown heritage but very brown and heavily accented) what it was, she just shrugged and said it was Mediterranean seasoning. Wisht I had me some of that, whatever it is. It tasted slightly peppery.

Atlanta tornado

2008-04-03T21:18:00.001-04:00

This is a picture from downtown Atlanta. The tall round building in the middle of the picture is the Westin Peachtree Plaze hotel. You can see all the windows that were blown out. This pic was taken about 6 days after the tornado last month. Several other buildings were also hard hit and lost windows. As we were driving through Cabbagetown district, a huge piece of roof was dangling from the power line over our heads. Traffic was awful because so many streets were closed. It took us a long time to get through town.

picture this yourself..not for squeamish

2008-03-31T21:36:00.003-04:00

No picture need accompany this story. Really. One of my recent adventures included being bitten by something. Maybe a brown recluse, or maybe another spider. The doctor said it's just a guess when you don't have the critter for evidence. Whatever it was, it made me really sick. I woke up in Savannah feeling fine, but then started feeling yucky. It was the day we drove home so I wasn't much good for driving. By the time we got to Atlanta I felt AWFUL. By the time we got home, I had a fever. All this time I thought it was just a virus. I hadn't been home 5 minutes when I sat down and noticed that my knee hurt. I looked and saw a bite. Clearly a gross looking bite. By the next morning it looked like someone had put out a cigar on my knee. It's been almost two weeks and it STILL looks like someone put out a cigar on my knee. I had 10 days of antibiotics and daily doses of antibiotic ointment. My skin has flaked off the area (about the size of my thumbprint) and it still has blisters and a telling red, white and blue pattern (characteristic of spider bites). My good friend the nurse said it was necrotic (meaning 'dead'...yuck yuck yucky) but that it was normal for bites. I've read up on spider bites and learned that they inject some sort of protein that dissolves other bugs and apparently people and that they are full of nasty bacteria.

Overall, tho, I feel lucky. I did look at some pictures online and at least I won't have to have skin grafts or lose parts of my body. The doctor said it would leave a scar, but that's ok. Can't see it amid fat folds and wrinkles anyway. Moral: if you get bitten by a spider, get on antibiotics asap. My brother said he's known 3 people bitten by brown recluses and two of them had to walk around with IV antibiotics because they let it go on too long before seeing a doctor. And then, there's the story a co-worker told me about someone who had to have their spider bite lanced and baby spiders came out. I wish she hadn't told me about that.

long time, no see

2008-03-28T17:38:00.000-04:00

I've been negligent. I admit it and I'm sorry for it. It's not because I haven't thought of you, dear blog, but other things have gotten in the way. Just life, mostly, but I have had two rounds of minor illnesses and I was out of town for a few days. Where to start....

Current interests include my new computer, except I had to send it back to the shop to get the screen fixed or replaced. I got it on ebay, a refurb Dell and it's great, except the screen was unacceptably dark even tho it was on the brightest setting. I only had it for a few days but really loved it, mainly because it had Games After Dark. I'm not much of a gamer because I'm no good at them, but I do like puzzle types of games. GAD has a game called Roof Rats that is totally addictive. I played about 300 games of it in the short few days I actually had the computer, and never improved, but it didn't matter. What I liked about the game was watching the little cartoon dog splat on the ground as I clicked and moved various colored blocks from under him. That probably doesn't make sense, but the whole concept of the game is that you find two adjacent blocks, click on them and they disappear. The things that are on top of the columns of colored blocks move down as you make the blocks disappear. The things on top (old lady, strong man, dog, mouse, boy on bike, etc.) will hop down to the ground and run off the screen at different levels of moving down their column of colored blocks. The idea is to get everyone down and get rid of as many blocks as you can. But my favorite part is watching the dog splat as it falls. That's it. It totally entertained me for hours and hours last weekend. It didn't matter that I seldom won or that my skills didn't improve, or that I am still at the easy level. Splat! goes the dog. And I love dogs.

Remind me to tell you about my spider bite. As soon as my computer gets back I'll show pics of my trip to Savannah, the tornado damage in Atlanta and my favorite restaurant in Georgia. (Shrimp & grits anyone?). And then there's the real dog I accidentally ran over (I really hated that and I really love dogs) and the dog belongs to a really crazy man. So you can see why I've been too busy to blog. On the other hand, when the other computer comes back, I might be too busy with Roof Rats to write......nah..I promise.

jammies

2008-03-05T23:25:00.002-05:00

I raised quite a stir in my own living room by walking in with pajamas on. I haven't worn pj's in many years. Haven't owned any or even thought about it. I'm a gown kind of girl. My mother had some pj's that I had given her that stretched all out and were baggy, so she gave them to me. They fit me fine and I actually wore them last night. Soft cotton, coziness and the cuteness factor make these a keeper. I might get some more. Now, it feels good, but come heat and humidity....maybe not so good. I'll have to see. Imagine these green polka dots comin at 'cha.

Aren't you glad you tuned in to this drivel?

2008-03-02T20:05:00.000-05:00

I thought that I had blogged a few days ago, but now I don't see it, so maybe I dreamed up the whole thing.

Anyway, it's March and my obsessions are diminishing quickly. Yee haww, spring is on it's way. It doesn't matter if it gets cold or snows or hails...spring is imminent now. The whole weekend was like spring outside and I think most people feel much better.

My deep thoughts have drifted to an event that occurred a few days ago at work. A young woman (under 30) witnessed someone who had a seizure. It really unnerved her and she came to the room I was in right afterward. She said she had never seen anyone have a seizure before. That stunned me. How could you live to adulthood and never see a seizure? I mentioned it to my husband, who said he had only seen a couple of seizures. That stunned me too. He asked me how many I had seen, and I couldn't answer. Lots and lots. I estimated maybe a couple of hundred. I went to elementary school with a girl named Kathy Thomas. She had seizures about every day for years. She was slow and this was in the days before special education. The teacher modified her work and Kathy often went home after her seizures, so she was absent for much of the time, but the seizures were not cause for alarm for anyone. It was pretty routine and we all got used to her falling out in the floor. And in all the jobs I've had, people have had seizures. Different kinds and to different severities, but frequent. I guess new medications have lessened the chances that people will have a seizure, so I suppose it is possible now to grow up and never see one. I wonder what happened to Kathy Thomas. I wonder as medicine advances, what people will think of in the future when they hear about these mental storms that used to take people down or make them behave so erratically. I never thought that people my age probably saw more seizures than people do now.

winter obsessions

2008-02-22T17:40:00.000-05:00

Last weekend it was the two state search for the perfect duffle bag. I covered over 100 miles of malls and stores looking for it. Didn't find it, either. Color wasn't important as long as it wasn't black. Size and shape mattered more, and quality to some extent. Finally ordered one from ebags. Then, there was the tote bag search. Most of the searching was done on line. I got really, really hung up for two days at the llbean website where you can design your own canvas tote bag. You pick pocket or no pocket, zipper or no zipper, one of four sizes, and then colors. Oh MY GOD! the colors. Color for handles, then color for gusset, then color for main part of bag, and the color for the pocket, and the color of the bottom part that curls up the side. The potential and combinations are vast. I spent hours (HOURS) creating bags from ugly to lovely. I couldn't decide. So while I was looking at duffles across two states, I took ganders at totes. Ended up ordering it from ebags also. It came in the mail already, and I like the material, color, features, but it might be too small. If it stays cloudy and cold much longer, I guess I'll be back at the llbean website admiring ugly but unique bags again.

And now for this week's obsession...........(drumroll.......)......a scanner radio. This is commonly known as a police scanner. I impulsively decided that it would be a good thing to get to listen to trains. (Believe it or not, a lot of people apparently listen to train chatter on one of these scanners). The one that was on sale was the NASCAR version, which means it is red, has a little cute nascar logo, and has the frequencies of nascar drivers pre-programmed into it. I guess people go to races and listen to the drivers and crew talk. I even got a list of drivers and their assigned frequency. But, that's not why I got it. I got it because it does the same thing as the radios that cost twice as much and aren't as cute, just so I can listen to trains. Except, this radio is not user friendly. It's not intuitive. I'm fairly good at these electronic devices, but this one is beyond me, so far. I haven't given up, and I"ve listened to enough to whet my appitite for more, but I'm far from proficient. What I've learned so far...

Everyone but me has a gun. People walk around all the time with ball bats and pipes. The police give out your driver's license number, name, car tag number and your social security number over the airways everytime they stop you. The dispatchers are all calm, all the time. There's a lot more going on than I thought in the world of crime in my little area of the world. I have a pretty low tolerance for the anxiety that is produced by hearing about people they can't find, fights among spouses that get physical, suicide attempts and fires in houses filled with drugs. I have to turn it off after a little bit of listening.

And so far, I've only heard one train.

cultural differences

2008-02-14T14:49:00.002-05:00

I've had several occasions recently to work with families who speak languages other than English. It's really not that common where I live, but has suddenly become common and problematic. I have responsibilities to insure that the families receive translation services, if needed, and to have written information in their native language, if possible. It hasn't worked out too neatly because of a lack of resources and (IMHO) a lack of initiative on the part of the higher-ups, but we try to provide. This has led me to thinking about cultural differences, too. And some of my travels have exposed me to different cultures here in the U.S. of A., for example, Navajo traditions and ways. In one of my email discussions with a colleague, I was rambling and it occurred to me that in some small ways, I was culturally different. Before that revelation, I hadn't really thought of myself in those terms.

Although I was born in the east, I grew up in the west. Serious western desert. 120 degrees every day in the summer. Low desert, not far from Death Valley, Mexico, California and the Colorado River. The Colorado was only 6 blocks from my house. By the time it reached that part of Arizona, it was a trickle of water, what we would call a stream or creek in the east. We could easily wade across it and not get our shorts wet. When I was 12, we moved to North Carolina. The first school I attended was in a town called Bridgton and it sat on the banks of the Neuse River and some other river that joined it just before they flowed to the ocean. The water was deep, fast, choppy and brackish AND IT WAS AT THE EDGE OF THE PLAYGROUND! I don't know if you can imagine what it's like to go from desert to lots of rain and a huge river. I didn't know the natural properties of water, so as far as I was concerned, that raging river was liable to jump it's banks at any moment and wash me away. I was terrified to go on the playground and couldn't imagine why a school would be built next to such a dangerous thing. I wasn't afraid of water in general and was actually a good swimmer, but I knew I didn't stand a chance if that water came after me.

Well, that musing led to some other things that I remember being ignorant about. I remember seeing tree branches touching overhead while we were going down a road (in Arkansas). I thought it was really cool that this tunnel of trees had been designed. It took awhile before I caught on that trees just grew and weren't shaped deliberately in most cases. I remember going up a mountain and thinking that we were just going to fall off. It was a small two lane road that twisted and turned and it seemed like we would slide off like dirt, or rocks or water. I didn't know what a gymnasium was. I had read the word in books, but I had never seen one. (In the desert you just play outside all the time because it doesn't rain. None of the schools I had ever seen had a gym). I couldn't imagine what "overcast" referred to. Again, I had read it in books but it didn't have meaning. My parents tried to explain it to me, but I couldn't picture it until we were in Texas and my mother pointed to the sky and told me that it was overcast.

We lived near a marine air base and an army proving ground. I thought everyone got knocked out of their seats at school regularly by sonic booms. It was a long time in the east before I thought, "Why don't I hear those anymore?" We didn't have air conditioning or a shower in our house, so those were new experiences. I must have been in my teens before I took a shower.

On the other hand, I knew how to avoid getting stung by scorpions, how to live with and watch out for the black widow spiders that were inside and outside of our house, how to catch big lizards, which cactus I could touch and which ones to give a wide berth to, and all about Mexican food. (Taco Bell had not come east in 1966 and few people in the east knew what a taco was). I knew a little Spanish, how to recognize the sour oranges on the trees, and how to grab limes from the trees in the school yard. I didn't know about lightening, though and it was years before I wasn't terrified of it.

trains

2008-02-10T00:36:00.000-05:00

This scene is only about 15 minutes from my house. It reminds me of a scene you might see from a train but I saw it from the road. It's in a little cove community called Falling Water. It's relevant today because I spent a good part of the afternoon reading about Amtrak. We have booked our train trip, but decided to go on into Montana and stay at East Glacier Park instead of staying in Minot, ND. We'll leave from Memphis, go to Chicago and change trains, then on to East Glacier. Total train time about 40 hrs. We will stay in East Glacier for a couple of days, rent a car and drive around, and then take the train back. We have sleeping accomodations the whole way, which makes us First Class passengers. Cool. I never get to be first class anything! We get the use of the special lounge in Chicago for First Class passengers, we get meals included on the train, a newspaper daily, plenty of fresh coffee and someone even makes up our beds at night. Plus, we get to lay down on a bed (of a fashion) and maybe actually sleep. I think it will be fun.

In reading up on the trains, I've found websites and blogs from some serious train freaks. For some reason, trains seem to attract a large OCD crowd. One guy has made a point of visiting and taking pictures of every Amtrak station in the country. Someone else has drawings of the inside of the trains. Other people have info about particular train cars, so I can look up the train we've been assigned on a specific leg of the trip and find out a whole lot about it...which bathroom has the best water pressure, where that car usually is along the line, which bedroom has the window that needs a piece of wire to close it to keep it from rattling, etc. I guess my OCD tendencies match up pretty well, since I've spent several hours now, reading about all this trivia. Whoooo Whooooo

this weekend's movie reviews

2008-02-03T20:04:00.000-05:00

The best day of the whole year to go to the movies is on Superbowl Sunday. No one goes. It's also a good time to go to a restaurant. So, today it was dinner and movie day. Yaaaahhhh! Today's movie selection was "No Time for Old Men". Coen brothers. Excellent movie. I did have to close my eyes a few times because of gore, but the acting, story, etc. was great. Cormac McCarthy novels translate to movies well, in my opinion. I've never been able to read one of the books...too dry, but the visual details are so rich on the screen. Tommy Lee Jones played himself, as he usually does, but he's endearing, funny and smart, so it works.

Last night's movie was "The Diving Bell and the Butterfly". Whew. Take some extra zoloft before you see this one. Some people see it as an uplifting movie. I didn't see it as inspiring, or uplifting or redeeming. It's like I remember "Old Yeller" from when I was 5. It's just tragedy all around.

That's the report. And if you disagree, keep it to yourself. I've heard enough opinions on everything from politics to race relations to movie selections in the past few days. I need a little break.

sometimes life ain't a bowl of cherries

2008-02-02T01:09:00.000-05:00

I feel like I've spent the past couple of days inadvertantly pissing people off. Oh well, some days are like that. At least it's Friday.

I'm trying to plan a trip for our 25th wedding anniversary coming up this spring. We have camped for 25 years, but that's not an option right now, so alternatives are coming to mind. Planes are no fun. Time will be limited to a week. Neither one of us cares for the idea of a big cruise with thousands of others. One of us likes the idea of a small cruise, but the other one is less than enthusiastic about all that time on a boat. So, we're looking at Amtrak. The preferred route at this stage of the planning would be to take a train from Atlanta to Minot, ND. What's in Minot, you might ask. We don't know. Never been there. Never even been to N.D. It's just seems like a cool place to go. The current plan is to spend 3 days getting there, one day there, and 3 days to return. Bingo. Instant trip. Includes beds, meals, entertainment (looking out of the window), plus we'd get to see a big chunk of the country via D.C. and Chicago. And they give us bottled water.

Movie reviews

2008-01-27T22:57:00.000-05:00

I saw three movies at theaters this weekend. It's January, still cold, gotta get out of the house. Apparently everyone else feels the same way, because everyplace I went over the weekend was crowded. Roads, parking lots, grocery stores, movies, etc. I guess there's a lot of house bound folks looking for entertainment. But my entertainment was good. Here's a synopsis, and I don't think there are any spoilers:

Juno: good movie, odd music that you have to listen to the words, great acting, but I didn't think it was all that funny. Having teenage daughters made it hit too close to home I think. But the message was good in the end.

American Gangster: this was already at the $2.50 theater. It was very good. Plot driven, acting solid (Denzel and Russell), long (3 hrs), but very interesting movie. True story.

There will be Blood: Based on book Oil by Upton Sinclair. Danial Day Lewis nominated for Oscar for this performance. I don't think he has any serious competition. They can just mail it to him now. Interesting story about a man, his character (good and bad), and the relationships he has with others over a 30 yr period. Also long (3 hrs).

So, that's what I did all weekend. That, and read about UFO's. More on that later.

I wish I had a picture to show of this...

2008-01-23T20:48:00.000-05:00

....but I didn't have my camera with me and it would have been too awkward to take a picture under the circumstances anyway.

On Sunday I was with a friend on the way to the "good" grocery store across town and we were going to stop for lunch. The place I had in mind was closed, but there was a French cafe in the same little strip mall, so we stopped there. (Where I live, French anything is rare.)The first clue to this twilight zone experience was that although the sign outside said "OPEN", there were no signs of life, no lights, nothing. But my friend K. tried the door anyway. It was locked. As she started back to the car, the door was unlocked and opened by the proprietor, a little French woman. So we parked and went in. The place was half the size of my living room, and my living room ain't that big. It had 4 small tables with little space between. In the corner sat a very pale older woman (maybe late 60's or so) who was eating a bowl of soup. After each bite of soup, she would begin to fall asleep and her head would head toward her bowl of soup. The Frenchwoman would ding a little bell that was sitting on the table and the pale woman's head would jerk up, and she'd start on another bite of soup and the process would start all over again. The bell was like the ones they have in motels at the front desk. The two women seemed to know each other and joked a little that the pale woman was tired and that's why she kept falling asleep. Nobody is that tired. She was narcoleptic.

Anyway, we ordered and ate. It's a long story involving soured half and half, too much mayonnaise and chunks of onion on the chicken salad sandwich, canned mushroom soup, and a shockingly high bill of over $15 apiece, but the dinging bell went on the entire time we were there. When we left, the pale woman was still working on the same little bowl of soup and still falling asleep after every bite.

I got them January blues...

2008-01-20T00:02:00.000-05:00

It's cold and cloudy and cold and cloudy and I feel like this turtle. Slow and cold and cloudy. It happens every year at this time, I start thinking about spring, and warm weather and vacations and spending money on things I don't need. I also get a tad obsessive. Today I'm obsessed with Hillary Clinton and the primaries, scientology and the tom cruise video on youtube, finishing the pineapple shawl I'm crocheting, mon tricot magazines, finding a cheap but serviceable office chair I can take to work, and taking pictures of odd urban landforms, like a creek that flows through the backyards of a poor part of town. BTW, the turtle in this picture was only about 3 inches long.

these are now on my car

2008-01-18T19:10:00.000-05:00

I ordered these from Cafepress and added them to my bumper, which also includes a Hillary Clinton sticker. No doubt where I stand. I love political bumperstickers. They look better on my car except I put them on crookedly. Real crookedly. Oh well, point made.

Family photo

2008-01-15T22:04:00.000-05:00

Isn't this a creepy picture? This is my paternal grandfather. He died when I was less than 2 years old, so I don't remember him. I think I only saw him once or twice anyway. His name was Esau, and from the stories, he was about as mean as he looks. He reminds me of Grandpa on the Munsters. I had only seen one picture of him before this one, and he didn't look any friendlier in it. This picture was sent by a cousin to my brother, who showed it to me. And those flowers make the whole scene more macabre.

2008-01-12T22:36:00.000-05:00

In my corner of the room, sits this, as of Dec. 27th. My darling daughters got the bookcase for me to hold my "moat". That's what they call the semi-circle of clutter that surrounds MY chair. My moat contents vary, but usually include yarn, bags to put yarn in, my laptop, several pairs of shoes, socks, magazines, books, a box of Kleenex and ALWAYS, my newspaper. AT THIS MINUTE, my moat includes all of the above mentioned things AND 3 purses (I do like to change purses often), a crocheted baby blanket in pink I finished yesterday, and my new tell-all Joan Rivers book I got at Bargain Mart this morning. So, the bookcase helps tremendously, but I still have a moat.

Only in the south...

2008-01-09T18:44:00.000-05:00

...is this scene not uncommon. Driving home from N.C. we stopped to wash the salt spray off of the windshield. It was so cold, the pump for the windshield sprayer had frozen, requiring us to throw bottled water on the windshield periodically and use the wipers like mad before it froze over again. I looked over at the convenience store and saw that they conveniently had rebel flags everywhere. Ironically, a young black girl was operating the place.

It shouldn't matter what I say, so much...

2008-01-06T13:22:00.000-05:00

.....but it does to people. I'd like to be able to say what I want without other people taking it so seriously. At my advancing age, I'd like to be less cautious, less guarded, but if anything, my opinions matter more to other people, and ironically, less to me. So, I think I talk less to avoid the appearance of my opinions being worthy. Then, on the other hand, there are times when I am a true sage, and my wisdom and insight are invaluable to all humans. I don't want to miss those opportunities.

2008-01-04T23:03:00.000-05:00

A gnarly tree in the Smokies.

Happy New Year

2008-01-03T00:01:00.000-05:00

Actually, I took this on the 2nd of Jan. I was in the mountains overnight and it snowed and this was a scene on the way home. We haven't had much snow in a long long time, so it was fun to see. Not enough to make snow cream, tho. It was really cold, about 18 degrees where I took this picture. I like cool, but not so cold that I have to wear a hat all day inside the house.

Apple cake and hot buttered toddies

2008-01-01T01:34:00.000-05:00

This a picture of the apple cake my friend K made for Thanksgiving. It's relevant now, because she made another one for tonight's revelry. The second one didn't look as pretty, but it tasted good anyway. I only got a bit of crust that was leftover. It was a big hit. It all went well with the Cincinnati Five Way Chili and the hot buttered rum, although some had eggnog from an old Mississippi recipe, and some had wine and champagne, and some tried a little of all of it.

Uncle B's t-shirt

2007-12-30T22:02:00.000-05:00

I'm really enjoying getting to know Uncle B. He moved here from FL over the summer and I had never seen him sober before, but now that I see him more often, I know that he isn't a drunk at all, but just someone who likes to drink. And he wore this cool shirt to the family dinner at my SIL's house. And he called me 'buddy'.

Movie review

2007-12-30T21:46:00.000-05:00

I went with G and K and DH to see "Walk Hard" with John C. Reilly. Very funny. Favorite scenes include when the main character compares his philandering ways to his wife drinking up all the milk so he has none for his corn flakes. And a scene that includes the Beatles is hysterically funny. A good choice to end the season of family dinners. Family left town and next event is New Year's Eve gathering tomorrow (we're too old to really party down), but the Cincinnati Chili will be flowing, as will the martini bar. I'm thinking mojitos, too.

5 family dinners in 6 days

2007-12-29T23:49:00.000-05:00

....but at least we all like each other. And now, Christmas is finally over. Yeeaaaaahh

more family dinner news

2007-12-28T23:52:00.000-05:00

So, another family dinner. It was pleasant, but I'd like a break. Not to be. They are all coming to my house tomorrow night, but then it should settle down considerably. My FIL, whom I am very fond of, has Alzheimer's and has short term memory issues. He was drinking a glass of wine. My SIL asked if he wanted another glass, he said yes, and she poured more for him and set it in front of him. About 90 seconds later, he looked at it and said, "Where did this come from? I was drinking beer." He drank it anyway. It did seem to help him relax and be a little more outgoing. I miss his old self.

2007-12-27T20:16:00.000-05:00

Was busy again all day, but I guess that's what some vacations are like. Went to Home Depot to buy a door for Mom, then took her to Dr., then ate late lunch, then home to finish updating my new GPS. Then, I got a late Xmas present from my girls...a bookcase to put all my moat/nesting stuff on, next to my crochet chair. It looks good and is already full and broken in. Great addition to the room. Now, I'm waiting for my nephews to get here from CA for a few days. More family dinners tomorrow. I did make two hats while waiting on Mom. And my GPS did update like it was supposed to.

2007-12-26T21:14:00.000-05:00

Another day, another family dinner. No crisis, no drama, no problem. I did get my two thousand eight calendars at half off at B&N. A Crochet a Day, a penguin calendar, a weather one, and a Greek Island small one. I like calendars in every bathroom, the kitchen, my office and one just to look at (the crochet one). I'm particular about calendars...size matters, lots of color is preferable, and nature for most of them. So, I'm covered and good for the year.

My Christmas Day

2007-12-25T21:13:00.000-05:00

merry christmas, everyone. santa was very very good to me. I got a knife set with matching steak knives (a first), and a GPS system....the Magellen 3100. makes me wanna go take a drive, except I'm too tired after making most of the Christmas dinner. It was good though, and I was glad to see the whole family survived another year. As I write this, my two nieces are still here chattering away with my daughters. There's also a sense of relief. Yaaaahhhhh. Christmas is over and now I can maybe relax....and go see some movies.

2007-12-24T23:59:00.000-05:00

social skills

2007-12-24T23:12:00.000-05:00

I've been thinking about social skills this week and the younger generation's lack of them. Not everyone of course, but when I've been out shopping for Christmas presents I've come across rudeness. For example, I was at a bookstore and the person who was answering my question stopped to answer the phone, and quit looking up what he was looking up for me. No word of apology, no explanation, no eye contact or shrug or anything. He just left me hanging. Rude. My daughter says it's because of people relating to computers, not each other directly. Then in the newspaper yesterday there was an article about the difference between boomer expectations and the 20-somethings when it comes to service. So, I'm not the only person who's noticed.